For the past ten years I was practicing anorexia and bulimia. I had been in and out of treatment centers since I was sixteen years old and had spent over sixty thousand dollars on treatment and counseling. I came to the ranch addicted to drugs, a heavy smoker, engaging in self harm, malnourished physically and spiritually and very hardened by my sin.

I was raised in a Christian home with two loving parents. We attended church on Sundays growing up and I was very involved with the church youth group. I went on missions trips, went to church camps, and weekly bible studies. I can't explain my sin away, or point to something other than my own deceitful heart (Jeremiah 17:9). All I can say is that it was SIN! I was self-focused, compulsive, seeking pleasure, and my pride ruled my life. I felt like I couldn't stop.

The Lord used my parents to bring me to The Father's Ranch. They had heard about the ranch from friends at church. They were encouraged to hear that it was a bible-based, Christian facility and that it was free of charge. They urged me to apply to the program. My resources were exhausted from my lifestyle of sin. By the Lord's great mercy I was accepted to the ranch as a student. He took me out of the pit and brought me here. He rescued me from the grave! (Psalm 107:17-21, Psalm 103:1-5).

What hope the Lord brings! I'm not stuck with a "disorder" or "addiction" anymore! (As had been engrained in me from the other treatment places I had been to that subscribe to a disease or medical model of counseling.) My lifestyle and habits were sin, and therefore I have hope in Christ for the forgiveness of sin. Through Christ's death and resurrection I have been forgiven. He has softened my heart and has taken away my heart of stone (Ezekiel 11:19-20, 36:25-27). He chose me, not because of anything I had done but because of His great mercy (Titus 3:4-7). I am no longer a slave to sin (Romans 6:5-14) and His light shines through me (2 Corinthians4:6, 7). My confidence comes through Christ and not in myself (2 Corinthians 3:3-6). The Lord has bought me with a price and I am not my own (1 Corinthians 6:19, 20). I am to live a holy life (1 Thessalonians 4:7, 8) and to live a life worthy of the calling I have received (Romans 8:12-17). I am still learning that the strength and the ability to do this comes from the Lord through Christ and the Holy Spirit (1st Peter 4:10, 11).

It is taught at the ranch (and in the scriptures) that you must be diligent to renew your mind with the Truth of the Word of God (Romans 12:2), to be in the Word often, to memorize and meditate upon them, and to be in constant prayer with the Lord. I pray daily for a hatred of sin and for greater faith in the Lord. I pray for the desire and ability through Him, to repent and become more reliant upon Him. I am so undeserving, and yet, how wonderful are His many promises!

---Cassie